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It's been almost 3 years since a journal update.
Life changes. So many changes. Being a mother changes a person. My art and my self have become secondary and I do not regret this.
We lost a piece of ourselves two years ago. And we rebuild.
So, here's to rebuilding, and finding my muse again.
<3
- C
Life changes. So many changes. Being a mother changes a person. My art and my self have become secondary and I do not regret this.
We lost a piece of ourselves two years ago. And we rebuild.
So, here's to rebuilding, and finding my muse again.
<3
- C
A Walk Through Hell
And if I could swim
I'd swim out to you in the ocean
Swim out to where you were floating
In the dark
And if I was blessed
I'd walk on the water you're breathing
Lend you some air for that heaving
Sunken chest
'Cause they chose you
For the model
Of their empty little dreams
With your new head
And your legs spread
Like a filthy magazine
And they hunt you
And they gut you
And you give in...
And if I was brave
I'd climb up to you on the mountain
They led you to drink from their fountain
Spouting lies
And I'd slay
The horrible beast they commissioned
To steer me away from my mission
To your eyes
And I'd stand there
Like
i'm running out of clock...
At Cavanaugh Park
Where I used to sit all alone in the dark
And dream about things that I cannot say
you always said destiny'd blow me away
and nothing's gonna blow me away
At Cavanaugh Park
Where you used to take me to play in the sand
And said to me, "Son, one day you'll be a man
And men can do terrible things."
Yes they can
And there was never any place
For someone like me to be totally happy
I'm runnin' out of clock and that ain't a shock
Some things never do change
Never do change
At Cavanaugh Park
We used to get high
Watching teams as they fought
They loved my friend Adam
But he always got caught
Man, that kid made f
Holy crap.
I haven't updated since Sebastian was born. About a year and a half.
I'm still around, sort of. I haven't updated anything for a while, but that's alright. I've been so busy with parenthood that I'm totally unsure that I have much creativity left at the end of the day. Do I regret it? Not at all. My heart is outside my chest now, and I love every minute of it.
I just wanted to say...um. Hi. Things are...swell. I suppose. I'm surrounded by good things. My mind isn't so good, but it's been worse, y'know?
That's all, really.
I hope to update more soon.
Little Ninja Is Here!
Sebastian James was born at 10:24 pm on 10/25/06. He weighed 6 pounds 4 ounces and was 19 inches long.
To make a very long story short, he ended up very dehydrated and lost a lot of weight very quickly, since he was early and didn't have the suck-reflex that he should have, on top of my breast milk not being in. We left the hospital with him weighing 5 pounds 11 ounces, and less than 48 hours later, on Monday, October 30th, he weighed 4 pounds 13 ounces. He was admitted into the NICU, and was treated there until the following thursday. I stayed with him in the pediatric unit at the hospital until Saturday, 11-4, and we came home.
Since then
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